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Over the last few days, I have been considering what this new blog should be about. A situation arose in my flat a couple of days ago which gave me a good starting point. I went down to the kitchen; only to find my boyfriend and his housemate discussing a date that he (the latter of course) had lined up for the following day. These are the words that I heard:
“You should make the move tomorrow otherwise you will end up in the ‘friend zone’ and that will be the end”.
After hearing this, I began to wonder… Does it really decrease the chance of action at a later date? It appears that men are afraid of friendship; not because of the friendship itself, but for the fear of giving the wrong impression.
But what men don’t realise is that women have a different kind of fear when it comes to their male friends; ‘I’m going to lose him… ‘This will mess up our relationship…’ ‘I love him so much that I don’t want to take the risk…’
But fear not. These thoughts are normal when it comes to attraction arising between two friends during a relationship. However, if you fall into this situation, it is totally worth trying. Let me tell you why:
Past experience has shown me that even if your roles change a little in the relationship, you can create a great, intimate loving situation. You just have to leave the fear aside. Having relations with a close friend can have its’ strong points as you already know each other so there is a level of trust there. Even if something was to go wrong and you were to break up; there is a previous state you could potentially go back to, whereas if it was someone you met initially as a love partner, it can result in the death of a relationship for life. This is why I am still friends with my ex boyfriends; because they were good friends before.
You could argue that men are wrong about getting closer to females in a non sexual way. Being a friend gives you a safe position to impress her slowly and carefully. It’s a tactical war as you get into her life and her head whilst finding out what she likes and what she doesn’t which makes you indispensable as she grows to the comfort of you looking after her. This is what opens the door to take it further.
- Friends to Something More? (crissybwell.wordpress.com)
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If someone were to ask you what the city of the love is, most humans and even machines (just type “City of Love” in Google Image and voilà) would say Paris. If you were to think about the palace of love, the Taj Mahal might spring to mind; built by the loving Shah Jahan for his favourite wife. You may mention a hundred different locations before you finally reach the crux. The real city of love is London and romance has been known to form in the most unique of places; including the tube!
We’re not joking. The ‘Transport for London’ should change its’ name to ‘Transport for Love.’ I’ve lived in Madrid, New York and Moscow and I’ve never had so much attention (buses are also included in here). People can often approach you when you least expect it, start a conversation and in 5 minutes they have your number! Being polite but picky is key otherwise you might just end up with half of London in your phone book.
I’ve often wondered whether men in London have a Masters in Love as they can flirt without giving the game away. Jokes aside; don’t feel bad if you are yet to experience this. It only happens to me a couple of times a year! What is true though, is that in this city you can find love in any corner and there will always be someone who finds you sexy and interesting. The coexistence of cultures and different races makes your black hair an ordinary thing in this country and quite often it can become a preferred characteristic for a hot blonde Irishman. Someone may love the shape of your eyes, the colour of your skin and your accent. There are new people coming and going every day who are looking for new experiences and adventures; and what better feeling is there than falling madly in love?
I arrived in London a year ago from Madrid. I made a pact with myself that I would avoid serious relationships. I stepped into the city on the 10th of July and on the 26th I started dating my current partner. Who would think? London is invaded by a spirit of perpetual youth and a sense of risk-less-ness. No matter what age you are or where you come from, here you have a beginning with people in the same situation than you in a huge city with thousands of activities and let’s be clear; lots of hormones.
When a good friend of mine visited me last May, she was shocked by the amount of men who tried to approach her in coffee shops which proves that you don’t even need to go to pubs or have a considerable night life. You could even find your soul mate on your way to work.
- The Taj Mahal (thepoordorg.com)